LYRIC

[Father:] Well Ryan, tomorrow's a big day Your mom's coming home from the hospital with your new baby sister
[Ryan:] baby sister
[Father:] That's right, baby sister
[Ryan:] baby sister
[Father:] So, uh, I think now is the time for us to go over some safety rules for when you're around your new baby sister
[Ryan:] safety rules
[Father:] Okay, rule number one: Always wash your hands before touching the baby
[Ryan:] wash hands
[Father:] Do you know why?
[Ryan:] no
[Father:] Well, because sometimes you have germs on your hands and germs are bad for the baby cause they can make the baby sick
[Ryan:] germs make baby sick
[Father:] That's right, that's right, Ryan Germs make baby sick
[Ryan:] germs make the baby sick
[Father:] Okay, rule number two
[Ryan:] more rules
[Father:] Don't feed the baby anything
[Ryan:] don't feed the baby
[Father:] That's right
[Ryan:] why?
[Father:] Well, because the baby needs to eat special baby food
[Ryan:] why?
[Father:] Ohwell, other food is bad for the baby
[Ryan:] other food bad for the baby
[Father:] That's right, good Now, rule number three
[Ryan:] more rules
[Father:] Never take hot water near the baby because hot water will burn the baby
[Ryan:] water bad for the baby
[Father:] Well, not all water, just hot water,
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] Cause hot water will burn the baby
[Ryan:] i don't understand, daddy
[Father:] Okay, see this glass of water that I'm drinking?
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] Well, this water is okay for the baby
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] Here, touch the glass
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] See, it's nice and cool
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] Now if this was hot water that would be bad because hot water can burn the baby
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby?
[Father:] Yes, hot water burn baby
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby
[Father:] Yes, yes, hot water burn baby
[Ryan:] hot water burn your baby
[Father:] Yes
[Ryan:] baby can't go in swimming pool?
[Father:] Oh no, the swimming pool is okay Swimming pool water is cool
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] That's alright
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] But the jacuzzi is bad because that water is hot and hot water will burn the baby
[Ryan:] hot water burn the baby
[Father:] Yes
[Ryan:] hot water burn the baby
[Father:] Yes Now say you made a cup of tea, would you take that near the baby?
[Ryan:] yea, baby like tea
[Father:] No Ryan, uh, I don't think you get it yet
[Ryan:] baby no like tea?
[Father:] Well, I'm sure the baby will like tea, but what do you make tea with?
[Ryan:] hot water
[Father:] Right, and what did we say about hot water?
[Ryan:] oh, hot water burn baby
[Father:] Yes, hot water burn baby!
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby!
[Father:] That's right so no tea near the baby
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby
[Father:] Yes
[Ryan:] baby no take bath?
[Father:] No, bath water is warm Warm is okay
[Ryan:] yes
[Father:] Hot is bad
[Ryan:] yeshot water burn baby
[Father:] Yes, hot water burn baby
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby
[Father:] I think you're gettin' it!
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby
[Father:] That's right, Ryan
[Ryan:] hot water burn baby
[Father:] NOW DON'T YOU EVER FORGET THAT!
[Narrator:] 30 year later!
[Wife:] Hey, Ryan, what are you doing out there?
[Ryan:] Just watchin' the discovery channel
[Wife:] Well, dinner's gonna be ready in about five minutes
[Ryan:] Aw, great baby, aight, I'll be in in a few momentos Lemme just wind down(garbled)
[Wife:] Okay, honey!
[Ryan:] Yeah
[TV:] The villagers of Pasquan
[Ryan:] Pasquan
[TV:] have a very bizarre and painful way of welcoming their infants into the community
[Ryan:] [garbled]
[TV:] Unfortunately, the death rate from this ritual is a mortifying 90 percent
[Ryan:] My God
[TV:] That explains the Pasquan's low population
[Ryan:] Yeah, it does
[TV:] On the first full moon of Autumn, all the Pasquanian mothers wrap their new-borns in traditional hand painted deerskin,
[Ryan:] Deerskin
[TV:] which have been passed along from generation to generation
[Ryan:] That's nice
[TV:] The entire Pasquan population then forms a circle on the sacred battlefield of Chin-Chara
[Ryan:] ya-yara
[TV:] Each Pasquanian baby is then passed, hand to hand, around the circle
[Ryan:] Wow
[TV:] four times
[Ryan:] Four times
[TV:] Once for the sun,
[Ryan:] Hmm
[TV:] once for the moon,
[Ryan:] The moon
[TV:] once for the earth,
[Ryan:] The earth
[TV:] and once for the wind
[Ryan:] The wind, too
[TV:] When the babies arrive back in their mother's hands, they are marched, in procession, to the Pasquanian natural hot springs
[Ryan:] What?
[TV:] where the ceremonial purification will be completed
[Ryan:] What are you saying here?
[TV:] As we watch, the mothers take their progeny out of the deerskin shells
[Ryan:] No
[TV:] and dunk them into the steaming water
[Ryan:] No! No! Hot water burn baby! Hot water burn baby!
[Father:] That's right, Ryan Hot water burn baby
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Wife:] Ryan! What's going on out there? Are you okay?
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Father:] Hot water burn most definitely burn baby
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Father:] That's right, Ryan Hot water burn baby!
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Father:] You are a bitch, Ryan!
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Wife:] Ryan, are you alright?
[Father:] Hot water burn the baby!
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Wife:] Ryan!
[Father:] What are you gonna do, whore?
[Wife:] Ryan!
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Father:] Bitch!
[Wife:] Ryan! What's going on out there?
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Father:] Whore!
[Wife:] Who are you talking to?
[Father:] Bitch!
[Ryan:] I'm talking to the man!
[Father:] Whore!
[Ryan:] Hot water burn baby!
[Wife:] Ryan!
[Father:] Bitch! Ryan is a whore!

Other Songs from Stan And Judy's Kid Album

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Hot Water Burn Baby Adam Sandler lyrics in Stan And Judy's Kid album

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